‘A Life Earned’

‘A Life Earned’…We have to lose our life in order to find our life, our purpose. If we don’t lose our life, we never find the truth of our being.

A Life Earned

I sit, stand, lay
wonder
over all these words
ponder
‒who am I
to earn such trust

sitting for hours and hours
doing His† work
for a future
I do not know
‒making my little fuss

thinking about
my own children
how much I'm missing
then...not guessing
for whom
lies my lust

all these days
have turned to years
from normal every-day living
to hurting and crying
laughing and just being
putting the kids
on a bus
to feeling like rust

all this time
listening
then writing
hearing His† soft voice
‒so many words
building a crust
with gustive thrust

'here I am'

I easily said
fighting anguish
in my head
as so many
labeled me‒
crazy, insane, obsessed
‒when all along
a teacher was saying

'don't hush
take this brush
put these words
in rush'

I had to forgo
every-day living
to sit in a silent room
listen
hear
to words being pushed

all the while‒
hoping for a hug
a gentle kiss
even the slightest touch
‒a bit of support
to this worded rush

over ten years now
I lost my life
in all its plush
because of the brush
the Lord† handed to me
in a lover's crush

'sing My† song to them
earn your place
you're running a good race'

words in reassuring gust
so that
I may continue
in faith's undying trust

Notes: The photograph is the second one that was chosen. I say the second because the first was of my face. I’m sick of my face. So, He chose His! It is from October 8, 2019: Oil Spill Warning.

(April 16, 2022)—No, He isn’t the author of this piece, He’s the author of the next. This piece is one directed from my heart. He was setting me up, to answer me. You will understand when you read the next piece titled, ‘The Void of Absence’ and the prayer of Nehemiah.

We have to lose our life in order to find our life, our purpose. If we don’t lose our life, we never find the truth of our being. As in ‘Dismissed Authority’ which was written on the fourteenth. It was a guided writing as well and it speaks truth. You can only dismiss truth for so long. It will catch up to you.

I’ve been made a promise. One…I don’t need to explain. I don’t know the how or the when. I do know the why. It is a BIG why. It is a sad why, but one I must accept. It is sad to watch truth unfold. The world has conquered itself into controlling the flow of Yeshuah. Only…they can’t. They just believe they have. Yeshuah is powerful. He is love. That pure kinda thing. That kind of love you can’t touch.

People are just stupid. Yes, I said that.

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