Healing is the primary objective to my work. At times, it may not seem so, but it is. We do have to know where we’ve been and we do have to understand what hurt us first. If we by-pass any of that, we do not heal. We stay stuck in an image-based small portion of self.
The following was taken from a website a while back and I thought I’d share it with you. I know a lot of you are struggling with a relationship that you may not understand. I’m no longer in a relationship myself although I am still living in the same house my the sweet man, I still understand the need to understand
My current situation has to do with money and God. I’m sure the writings from this experience will come. And it is an experience. I’m a bit angry about it and I let God and the sweet man know. He, the sweet man, chooses to completely ignore me. That’s expected but the fact is still God’s directing this journey because as I try to go elsewhere, doors are being slammed shut, which is not really normal. So, I’ll just go with and give it to the Lord.
The following prayers are for you who are in that relationship that you want to save. (Again the following is borrowed from the website at the end.)
Did not give up! Relationships are always worth restoring. God has given us the ministry of restoring relationships. For this reason a significant amount of the New Testament is devoted to teaching us how to get along with one another in fellowship.
If you’ve gotten anything at all out of following Christ, if His love has made any difference in your life, if being in a community of the Spirit means anything to you, if you have a heart, if you care—then do me a favor: Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends.—Philippians 2:1-2 (MSG)
Shame on you! Surely there is at least one wise person in your fellowship who can settle a dispute between fellow Christians.—1 Corinthians 6:5 (TEV)
I’ll put it as urgently as I can: You must get along with each other.—1 Corinthians 1:10 (MSG)
Jesus said, ‘God blesses those who work for peace, for they will be called the children of God.’—Matthew 5:9 (NLT)
You are only hurting yourself with your anger.—Job 18:4 (TEV)
God has called us to settle our relationships with each other.—2 Corinthians 5:18 (MSG)
Here are seven biblical steps to restoring fellowship:
1. Talk to God before talking to the person.
What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? You desire but do not have, so you kill. You covet but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God.—James 4:1-2(NIV)
2. Always take the initiative.
Jesus said, ‘If you enter your place of worship and, about to make an offering, you suddenly remember a grudge a friend has against you, abandon your offering, leave immediately, go to this friend and make things right. Then and only then, come back and work things out with God.’—Matthew 5:23-24 (MSG)
3. Sympathize with their feelings.
Look out for another’s interests, not just for your own.—Philippians 2:4 (TEV)
A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.—Proverbs 19:11 (NIV)
Let’s please the other fellow, not ourselves, and do what is for his good.—Romans 15:2 (LB)
Do not use harmful words, but only helpful words, the kind that build up and provide what is needed, so that what you say will do good to those who hear you.—Ephesians 4:29 (TEV)
4. Confess your part of the conflict.
Jesus said, ‘First get rid of the log from your own eye; then perhaps you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye.’—Matthew 7:5 (NLT)
If we claim that we’re free of sin, we’re only fooling ourselves.—1 John 1:8 (MSG)
5. Attack the problem, not the person.
When my thoughts were bitter and my feelings were hurt, I was as stupid as an animal.—Psalm 73:21-22 (TEV)
A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire.—Proverbs 15:1(MSG)
A wise, mature person is known for his understanding. The more pleasant his words, the more persuasive he is.—Proverbs 16:21 (TEV)
6. Cooperate as much as possible.
Do everything possible on your part to live in peace with everybody.—Romans 12:18 (TEV)
You’re blessed when you can show people how to cooperate instead of compete or fight. That’s when you discover who you really are, and your place in God’s family.—Matthew 5:9 (MSG)
7. Emphasize reconciliation, not resolution.
Work hard at living at peace with others. — 1 Peter 3:11 (NLT)
Jesus said, ‘Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.’—Matthew 5:9 (NIV)
Christ did not indulge His own feelings…as scripture says: The insults of those who insult you fall on me.—Romans 15:3 (NJB)
8. Be humble.
Be always humble, gentle, and patient. Show your love by being tolerant with one another.–Ephesians 4:2 (GNTD)
9. Offer forgiveness.
Instead, be kind and tender-hearted to one another, and forgive one another, as God has forgiven you through Christ.–Ephesians 4:32 (GNTD)
10. Communicate well.
Remember this, my dear friends! Everyone must be quick to listen, but slow to speak and slow to become angry.–James 1:19 (GNTD)
11. Have patience.
Let your hope keep you joyful, be patient in your troubles, and pray at all times.–Romans 12:12 (GNTD