A Vessel of Use
take me and break me
twirl me around
make me a dismissal
‒this awoken capsule
don't put me in dazzle
amongst men
who only leave me
to fizzle
instead, raise me in counsel
a straight-forward missile
upon sin….a muzzle
use my body, my mind
all that is physical
to be a beacon
somewhat an apostle
but more
upon pride…a chisel
filling up hearts
in a secret reversal
‒seeing you, my Lord†, work
changing me
from a broken-down weasel
to a fighter in wrestle
don't give me harmony
in a land or house parcel
but instead Spirit
that's beyond universal
give me the disposal
in order to build
in the Kingdom…a castle
where hearts aren't tousled
but…instead…sizzle
give me the words‒
on their hearts…let me stencil
foreverness in whistle
‒not just a drizzle
but a permanent fossil
engraved love
to be passed down
not just in miracle
but in worthy, God†-fearing appraisal
(March 30, 2024)—He led me to John 12:42-50.
Yet at the same time many even among the leaders believed in Him. But because of the Pharisees they would not confess their faith for fear they would be put out of the synagogue; for they loved praise from men more than praise from God.—John 12:42,43
Then Jesus cried out, ‘When a man believes in Me, he does not believe in Me only, but in the One who sent Me. When he looks at Me, he sees the One who sent Me. I have come into the world as a light, so that no one who believes in Me should stay in darkness. As for the person who hears My words but does not keep them, I do not judge him. For I did not come to judge the world, but to save it. There is a Judge for the one who rejects Me and does not accept My words; that very word which I spoke will condemn him at the last day. For I did not speak of My own accord, but the Father who sent Me commanded Me what to say and how to say it. I know that His command leads to eternal life. So whatever I say is just what the Father has told Me to say.’—John 12:44-50
[I heard the title. Yes, the title was given to me. I didn’t realize that Yeshuah had used this title in 2021: ‘A Vessel of Use’.]
I have been writing, directed writing, concerning The Shepherd of Hermas in the Apocrypha. This may seem strange, but I’m going to go ahead and write it anyway. I read this part of the Apocrypha months ago, and while I was reading it, I knew He would direct me to write about it. I just knew. How? Because it sounded a lot like a lot of things He had been telling me since 2019. If I have learned anything from God it’s this: There are NO coincidences.
As I already knew, a couple of weeks ago He told me to take what was given and put into my words. (With the help of David, of course). So, I wrote about the twelve commandments given to Hermas by the Shepherd which was given way after Jesus went back home and it is believed that the ‘Shepherd‘ is Jesus. I see that, too. So you take it as you like.
And that led me to a confusion and He has clarified it in works like ‘Essence of Nám: A Plague’s Fortitude’ that each new generation gets the same commands, but written to fit the times. He has said this many times when He refers back to me being the one writing them for this generation. Do you know how many people are in this generation? Over 8 billion now I think! And just that number brings me to question myself. How? Why me? etc. etc. Yeshuah grabs this questioning of mine and brings me to Scripture, to Himself!
So, I wrote about all the twelve commandments, then He says to give them to you. I haven’t yet, except for one and that one ‘Ultimate Energy’ hasn’t been read much. And this makes me question more. But it wasn’t before I got to ‘Trust in the Multitude of Good’ that really threw me off and confused me. That deals with the eleventh commandment and the difference between a real and a false prophet. I couldn’t help but question this. How am I to do the truth? Then there’s me questioning the Holy Spirit and truth Herself! He already taught me that lesson by locking my hips for a year when I questioned the promise made to me.
Accept and don’t question the Spirit directly! Just don’t do it!
I may repeat myself in these writings, so forgive me. It is okay and it is probably because it is worth repeating. Since January, things have happened that has to do with the promise, which has made me a bit stale in space, like I’m hanging there wondering where is God going with this. He says to trust. I do, but it leaves me in this state that I can’t readily explain…all has just about halted: The visions, the writings have slowed down and deep prayer. You will really think this comical, at least, I do: He said I am on vacation! It is like He’s stepping back for me to take in all that He is doing because, after all, He said my ultimate test is mercy.
I am walking the path. And He tells me it is still the one He chose for me. I wrote about the Jeep I just purchased. That confused me a great deal that I was even able to buy such a costly vehicle. He said it is for a reason. I don’t doubt this because He has done this so many times in my life, that I just flow with it.
This leads me to the next set of writings, which He said I will write on all of them. The Similitudes. There are ten of those.
Similitude: the quality or state of being similar to something; a comparison between two things; a person or thing resembling someone or something else.
He had me get personal with Similitude One because it is personal. The difference between a servant of God and everyone else: We can’t seem to find home here on Earth. It is a strange feeling to feel, but I’ve felt this way for a very long time and I’ve been searching, but I always come up empty-handed. Since my divorce, which before I stayed in the same place for over twenty years (but even then I had to have different from a mobile home to building a house to moving my family away to moving us back to adding to the home), I’ve moved like fourteen times! Regular people would call that insane, but anyone who is a true servant of God will recognize this immediately.
I can’t find ‘home‘ because I know my true home.
And this is what Similitude One is about. The Shepherd tells Hermas to stop preparing a home here on Earth, that he should know where his true home is and the preparation for ‘that‘ home is different than preparing a home that is of the world. I did this. I prepared a home that was of the world. I did this because I lived in a home from birth that was always preparing: Fixing home, decorating home, building more home, sowing the land, keeping the land pretty. I watched this as I grew up and in my heart this is exactly what I wanted to do. And God let me do it…for a time.
I grew restless on a continuous path. I wanted to move. I did move my whole family. Then we moved back. I wanted to buy another home and get rid of the one we had, then I added on, changed it. I was always searching…but never finding.
No one recognized this in me. They just drew me up to being ‘strange‘ or ‘crazy‘. No one saw that God was calling me. No one knows what that looks like in the true nature of the calling. Well, I’m telling you what it looks like. It’s not what you expect. At all!
The vast of society lean towards men getting a calling, towards seminary work and working in a building. Or building some mega church.
These are callings but for very different reasons….to get a message to souls who are lost and testing those who are called to the guild! Many fail. They take on the earthly role and want to please the world before pleasing God. And to test this, look around you, many are attending a building and killing Yeshuah again and raising Him from the dead again as they dress in their finest and shake hands and eat candy. But after it is over, they will return to their sinful nature and refuse to rise. God said this Himself in His resent words sent through me.
A true calling is hard. It is a sacrifice of the world. A true sacrifice. No, He doesn’t make a lot of us live in poor conditions, but the work is hard all the same. And it is not in just the work that is hard. It is what we have to be in order for His work to be completeed, at least the work He called each one of us to do.
It’s sacrificing of family. As you are doing the work for the Lord because you heard Him, those closest to you will not see this. Trust me some will even denounce Jesus Himself because of their pride. That’s not for us to judge. We cry and move on. In my experience, not many…no…none of my family support me. None. They don’t encourage me, they don’t pat me on the back, they don’t call or even sympathize with me because they should know what one has to do when God calls. They don’t. I’m judged instead. I’m written off like I don’t exist except when they need me to exist. I spend the better part of my years alone.
This is Similitude One. The difference between a true servant of God and a false servant and ordinary folks. We are forced to live simple. I do my hair. I apply makeup. I do my nails. I maintain a small one-bedroom apartment. When I say He has His hand in my life, I can’t even talk my way around it. He straps me in every time He wants me to stay put. Truly. And I give…I’ve learned He does what is best for me. He has me say what is best for others. I am just the vessel. He is the captain and has always been.
Today is the Sabbath and He has me writing this. He says that those of us who weren’t taught the truth, we go from here. We don’t go backward and we don’t put on weight that we cannot bare. That’s how He works.
I was filled with a bit of remorse this morning. I know why. They crucified Yeshuah again. They went through all their charades only to reemerge the same sinners they were before. God said they are hypocrites because they refuse to resurrect. I know what it takes to make that trip, that rise. It is hard. It is tearful and all the beings from Satan come in to try and stop you, and Yeshuah says put on the Spiritual armor and fight. And I had to fight with His words! HIS WORDS! I went the distance because my Father asked me to know His Son.
How sad it is to feel this remorse over a society that does the same thing over and over and never learns from it.
A true servant learns from the fall. Even though they want, for a time, find a permanent home and make it theirs, they never actually do. I don’t want to decorate. I don’t want to unpack things. And man sees this as depression. God sees this as not being my home and I am fully aware of it.
You stress over all this house and toys and go into a building with good clothes on and kneel down and listen to the words…without actually hearing them.
He rose. Once. Why do you keep killing Him and raising Him instead of yourself? I did have to die first so that I could live. Why don’t you allow this for yourself? Since, you are so hell bent on sacrificing Him again and again, why don’t you look at Him…really look at Him. Do you not see what it takes to rise? The flesh was stripped from His bones. This has to happen to you as well. In order to truly live, you first have to die. And in order to resurrect, you have to strip all that hurt you from your bones! Do you not understand this?
In my plea as His servant, Yeshuah, I have to ask you: Why don’t you understand this?
The photograph David chose is from October 15, 2019: The Phoenix! Of course it is. A rebirth is coming! The photograph was take at 5:09:33. The times are of some importance.
You can read all of the visions, dreams and words, as well as see all the images and see the time frame in which they were given by clicking on Message Index.
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