Tag: thefivestagesofgrief

A Sinner's Tale

I was he
and I was she
loving the Almighty†
but not taking heed

I heard the robust name calling
‒the disgracing deed
I saw the meek
bust into tears‒
as they were condemned
by He†

discipline on top of discipline
crippling
mind boggling‒
treasures to seek
buying
and multiplying
‒voids in fulfilling
without truly relying on Thy†

I was raised
‒this to seek

I saw it all increase
as my soul decreased

I lived as a constant‒
examinee
at every turn‒
feeling guilty

what wrong have I done‒
I could not see

so I took it on
‒for free
just feeling guilty
made it all easy

so I lessoned myself
to debris
‒no matter the degree
I was automatically
the disappointee

it didn't matter
what I achieved‒
the army
a college degree
a christian's decree
‒living righteous with honesty

I was still the refugee

it didn't matter my status
beauty and money
a divorcee and meek
a sinner
a catastrophe
‒the treatment was the same

no one stuck by me

even my writings‒
all became wasted graffiti
me….still the guilty

as I wandered in my grief‒
I witnessed a switch
in belief

those who caused the catastrophe
elevated‒
in a high steep
I….buried deep
as they soared in relief

‒their burden put on me
singled out of the sheep
me slaughtered‒
nice and neat

as I lay crying
a hand touched my cheek

'rise and write for Me†'

I felt so unworthy
for all of what life taught me‒
I was the reason
for the grief
‒the guilt of me
resided inside of me

'NO!' came from He†
'you are worthy
I† heard your plea'

as all who made me feel
guilty
‒they're still doing the same
as they did before
none of them
changed
‒still lost in the deceit

as I stand witness‒
to all the doings
of He†

(September 11, 2023)—He led me to the First Letter to the Corinthians…Paul. Maybe, it’s time that you studied this letter with open eyes instead of closed ones.

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