Note: The photograph of myself taken in November is just to remind you that women in the 50s are not dead. Men make us seem that way because those of us with brains don’t stand by and accept the sins of men. Men, who aren’t of the Lord, don’t like that very much. They too much like their sins. I often told myself in the past that I wasn’t going to be single in my golden years, but, in the back of my mind, I knew I would be. A lot of the world’s men want a woman to be quiet and accept. Sorry, that’s not what God wants of me. I’m told I’m still young and that my day is coming. I trust. I still have faith that God is going to reveal to me what true love looks like. When He does, I’m going to boast in ways you never knew possible. At 50 years old, soon to be 51, when you see that boast, you’ll know God sent me a man who sees my heart and not a piece of ass. That there…that’s real!
Grace in Age
tightness of skin...loosens
as hands travel along...adding flavor
character...cleverness in soften
lines gather around eyes
tiny moments around lips
a woman's saddened endeavor
as makeup creeps in deep
it becomes a hopeless feat
bringing about smiles in laughing
'why go so hard to try?
this heart is better to see
than color-painted eyes'
a body struggling in thin
for a man's touch
a sexual needing rush
'why bother'...she laughs in sigh
boys will boys–
always seeking youthful toys
always wanting to see
something delightful, pretty
instead of looking in deep
where truth, real, maturity
really does seep
age comes in...no where to hide
accept all those lines
even if alone you lie
–a toy you'd rather not
a woman in truth...instead of deny
a better way to live your life
a gentleman will someday see
your aged look...enough...pretty
enough...sitting, talking with maturity
than a toying sexuality
those who left you behind
them, too...gain those lines
lost in a memory's time
of what 'use to be mine'
(December 12, 2019)—Growing old together. That’s what it is meant by a two. Seems so much has been forgotten by so many folks. A woman shouldn’t have to worry about being alone in her golden years, but man seems to have forgotten the most about what it means to be a two. Man has forgotten who God is.
Why is this? What happened to faith? ‘Grace in Age’…it shouldn’t be hard. Trust and forgiveness should be the solid foundation with Jesus and God at the head. I’m so tired sometimes of writing the same thing over and over again. I shouldn’t have to. But reading the Book of Isaiah tells me we haven’t much changed. The only way to get to God’s idea of utopia is to understand His process. Maybe, just maybe, more folks then will understand that growing old together is a joy and should be delighted in.
All you men who look at women as pieces of meat to be devoured then tossed aside, you aren’t going to fair very well when your body sleeps. I heard somewhere that it takes a good woman to get a man into heaven. I wonder: Who determines what a good woman is? In all that I’ve experienced, men see a good woman as one who makes him feel good about himself. Wrong! In so many ways. A good woman is the one who challenges your demons and makes you look at the man in the mirror. Maybe when you finally realize this, you’ll stop running from woman to woman, or stop seeking a woman, of any color, to take care of you.
The maturity part…that is what a good woman is looking for. You, who are more worried about your life, talking about your imagined childhood, talking about your imagined successes…that’s not what a good woman is looking for. She’s looking for a man who loves her just the way she is. When she gets that, she wants…wants…to be a better person because he’s shown her that he wants to be a better person for her. Love is hard. Didn’t you get the memo? And God wants us to love…oh, that Jesus love is sweet…but word to the wise, that Jesus love is hard love…that which makes you look at self in ways you never dreamed. And that good woman…Jesus sent her!
