Ambiance of Night (Yeshuah)
it follows a pattern
this emotion you have
not trusting in Me
though it seems
it is never easy
to wage war
or to wage peace
war is easier
peace is harder
because it requires forgiveness
ambianceness
to go against your traditions
that flow easily through you
like wind through rain
it is too hard
let Me, Yeshuah
continue the lesson
the instructions
on the secret hidden treasure
it isn't through grace
but through salvation
that peace is found
it is through forgiveness
true forgiveness
that the heart settles
and words out of love
flow
one must seek Me
in order to find this peace
when another comes into your life
who does not have Me
peace leaves
both must have Me
in order to have peace
each is found
to also have complete love
complete respect
and this gentle awareness
of the other
an empathy of genuine concern
without this
there is no peace
to obtain this peace
takes a willingness of heart
in both persons
once this is achieved
the two become one
peace is your sole objective
to disrupt this achievement
means someone isn't yet healed
a gentleness is required
sin rages in unhealed hearts
their strife continues
round and round
in circles
without much release
no one can make another
heal
it is a sole objective
to want to be healed
now this doesn't mean
that all memory
is wiped clean, erased
it means peace settles in you
and your spirit is equipped
with the tools needed
to fight strife
to keep it at bay
not letting it enter
this is a serious matter
for pretenders have surfaced
more than any other time
the anti-Christs of the time
bleed injury
with every turn
they disrespect without thought
they corrupt with every turn
and confusion bask
in their every walk
they turn around and mock
all who follow Me
all who see Me
their injury is not always physical
they rather go after the spirit within
be on guard
the tempter stirs its tentacles
from every direction
stay in prayer within
keep My words close at hand
keep the Father in heart
and seal Him up inside
with armory of the unseen
if he has ears
let him hear
[He led me to 2 Chronicles 19:4-11 and had me write the following: '…Consider carefully what you do, because you are not judging for man but for the Lord, who is with you whenever you give a verdict. Now let the fear of the Lord be upon you. Judge carefully, for with the Lord, our God, there is no injustice or partiality or bribery….'
then He led me to 2 Chronicles 20:13-19.]
do you know what it took
to fight such a battle?
many who preach this verse
do not
because they take single lines
out of context
and do not reveal truth
the truth
having total faith
that the Lord can deliver
without doubt
nor have any fear
of praising Him at any given time
how ever loud you feel
you need to be
to give it to the Lord
means just that
without interference
by clutter and confusion
release these spirits
banish them!
I have them in My grasp
but it is up to you
to banish them
to hold upright My words
to be still in prayer
and wait
no matter how long it takes
don't overload yourself
with worry
worry brings no justice
I am He
who directs justice
when sought in prayer
to the Father
with all your heart and
all your soul
(October 30, 2024)―I was awaken at three this morning. I lingered in bed for a while then my phone dinged. It was put into my heart to message the sweet man by answering something he said a ways back. I did and this led to strife. I reacted to what he said with such harshness that I had to finally delete and block his number.
But there was a lesson to me and to you, which I’m to tell you. Narcissism cannot be healed by man himself. That person has to go to God, Himself, so that God can send in Yeshuah, the physician who heals.
Almost all the men in my life called me a narcissist, told me I was self-centered and was all about myself. I spent over seven years in therapy over this. Not narcissism but what these people said to me including my dad. Do you know what I learned? I wrote it over and over again. I refuse to baby a man! I refuse to be told I can’t do something! I refuse to be lied to, to be manipulated and set in a swirl of confusion as my mother was. I refuse to become a shadow of someone else. I had two feet and I was going to walk on them.
That’s not narcissism. That’s called independence.
Independent people do not steal, they do not manipulate, they do not scheme, they do not lie to people, they do not cause chaos, they do not cheat.
Independent people will give the benefit of the doubt every time. They will try to fit in. They will sometimes do things they would never do to fit in. Then they realize, they weren’t made to fit in. They weren’t made to stand out either. They were made to depend on themselves…a self-reliant person is a hard person to read because they always have a way out. It may not seem like it, but eventually they find their way by themselves.
This type of person often becomes a codependent because of a narcissist in their early life. Then they have to struggle with becoming independent of that, too. And they have to do things that singles themselves out for themselves in order to stay or keep that independence. You see, a non-independent person doesn’t quite understand that.
Narcissist schemes, cons, lies, manipulates, makes up stories about themselves that are far from the truth, they don’t really want you to know their families, they live in shadows and some live out loud but they are always in play of a game: to win someone over, to find new, to control.
I wrote about this as well, they mimic. They research and find qualities that you like and then mimic them. But they also portray their qualities onto you, so that you are set into confusion and swirls and dizziness. It’s insane to feel it. This first happened to me with the ex when we first separated. It was exhausting. To have it done to you by what you already know is kind of mind-bogging. Meaning you already know their schemes, then they come back, like they got a notebook or something and jotted down everything you told them or they went read about it then they plow you with…’you’re the narcissist, you’re controlling, you’re this and that.’
Yeshuah made me go through that again today. To see the truth about this mental illness that the person with it cannot see…they will never see their wrong, they can’t even receive forgiveness when someone offers it because they can’t see that they stole things that didn’t belong to them, they damaged things that didn’t belong to them, they hurt another human being…none of this registers as wrong with them. That is mind-bogging to witness as well.
So peace. I often pray that the Lord will send me a husband and He asks me why. God has made a promise and I can’t, for the life of me, see this happening. Of course, He always reminds me that nothing is impossible for Him. I tried to wiggle my way out of this, if that is possible. Even tried to bargain. You can’t, by the way, get out of a promise God Himself makes because every promise that He has ever made, it wasn’t really for the people He made the promise to. It was for a future that hadn’t arrived yet. God was setting pieces up for His plan to become.
I can’t argue with the Father nor with Yeshuah. I can argue with the sweet man because I can’t deal with being lied to or any of that other mess. So, I elect to keep my peace even if I have to remain alone for the rest of my life. This peace that Yeshuah brings to my soul, it’s easy to lose…it is so damn hard to keep…but I remain…sometimes crying but I see such wondrous things and I know they are from Him.
The less people you have in your life, the more peace becomes and its value is beyond measure.
The photograph Yeshuah chose today is from October 2, 2019: Wave Warning.
God’s Spirit Answers—All the men of Judah, with their wives and children and little ones, stood there before the Lord. Then the Spirit of the Lord came upon Jahaziel son of Zechariah, the son of Benaiah, the son of Jeiel, the son of Mattaniah, a Levite and descendant of Asaph, as he stood in the assembly. He said, ‘Listen, King Jehoshaphat and all who live in Judah and Jerusalem! This is what the Lord says to you: ‘Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s. Tomorrow march down against them. They will be climbing up by the Pass of Ziz, and you will find them at the end of the gorge in the Desert of Jeruel. You will not have to fight this battle. Take up your positions; stand firm and see the deliverance the Lord will give you, O Judah and Jerusalem. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Go out to face them tomorrow, and the Lord will be with you.’ Jehoshaphat bowed with his face to the ground, and all the people of Judah and Jerusalem fell down in worship before the Lord. Then some Levites from the Kohathites and Korahites stood up and praised the Lord, the God of Israel, with a very loud voice.—2 Chronicles 20:13-19
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