‘If I Could’

To give that Jesus kind of love is the hardest kind of love. It is rare but when you see it, you know what it is.

If I Could
 
if I could
I would
if I had known
words I wouldn't have blown
if I'd heard
I wouldn't have wasted words
 
but I didn't know
all I know
if I was angry
for love...hungry
all I know‒
I move in haste
at the sight of hate
I change my perception
when faced with deception
grab the illusion‒
shake it
in the realm of manipulation
 
all I know
I don't deal with evils‒
in forms of trivia
I don't take them
in my head‒
swirl
I beat them down
‒it doesn't matter
you or someone else
‒this is how evil's dealt
 
I throw all back to hell
match for match
I don't bow down
‒play like some silly clown
 
may way…just may
cause you to frown
‒feel beat down
this...for...you're in drown
with evil's in found
 
if I could
I would
smash that bitch
to the ground
bring you back around
shake you...tell you‒
hey, it's me
 
but I said the words
I wrote the words
 
hurt...I didn't betray
anyone
‒except evil
and all its ways
 
with better eyes
you have to see
hard love was heard
I flew like a bird
‒for with evil
I don't swerve
 
I hit it straight on
 
so if I could
be party to evil‒
I would
‒but I can't
I'll take the chance
so when I'm gone
you'll have a chance
‒with the light
dance

Note: The picture was taken on September 27, 2019: Love from Heaven. I wrote about this many times. The green orb and the helicopter. David said to take pictures of the helicopter and that I will see he is for real. I have a number of frames where the Orb is playing with the helicopter. I see orbs in all the movies and TV shows that I watch…IN EVERYONE of them. Those are different from this one. I’ve seen this type of orb in many pictures from friends. They are there for a reason. I know because David has told me things and when I look at the frames, when I get inside my apartment because I could never see the screen outside, I then see what he was talking about and why he had me take those particular pictures at that particular time. It’s something when you believe in something you cannot see. It’s awesome when God shows…SHOWS you what you normally cannot see! And in ALL these pictures, including those of my face, HE IS SHOWING YOU!

(November 20)—I love you. I feel this way for all that I meet. And this leaves a person with hardly any friends, but I feel, deep in my heart, that it is worth it. There’s a deeper love that all should feel, but most just feel the surface love or no love at all…love for self. That deeper love is the love that Jesus was talking about. If you can feel that, then you are not of the world. Instead you belong to Him. But it can’t have prejudice or hate or envy or jealousy or anything like that mixed with it…that makes you of the world.

Continue reading “‘If I Could’”

‘Senseless Botherings’

Fact: I’d rather be a Karen than any other name because I was born a Karen and that’s all I know how to be. So, if labeling TRUTH “a Karen”…You are right on point!

Senseless Botherings
 
manipulative tactics
adds a tartness
to life's many twists
 
a change in malice
towards the coming neurosis
open for the opportunist
‒a continued crises
keeping confusion
in madness
 
simple words
simple phrases
simple gestures‒
learned behavior
through hatred
‒variables of influence
 
to fit in‒
you must be
in consistence
with all the malevolence
without interference
 
to be white or black
depends on the surface
‒doesn't matter the mix
breed the educational fix
adds more fire
to the matrix
 
don't show too much
cheerfulness
or gratefulness
‒the other side of the fence
has a special cadence
to fix
all that nonsense!
 
in comes‒
a well-trained harness
bred in materialness
lack of godliness
full of darkness
‒they can't be bothered
with any happiness
 
they'll strip it
in pure rudeness
without thought
‒for their blindness
has made them mindless
to what matters
in gratefulness

Note: I will continue to point out the photographs that I was directed to take. I don’t have to take anymore I was told. I have taken enough to show you God! You can question these photographs. You can picked them apart. The symbols that appear are not camera tricks. In one photograph, God converts the symbol into an angel. Search this site God’s Mercy to discover them all. I have left none out. He wants…WANTS…you to view them, to pick them apart. I’m told within these symbols are some sort of message. I am only to present them. The vine is suppose to come together and discover them. This was way before all this wrath that is upon us. Sooner or later, you will figure all this out. From the scars that He puts on my face, to what the orbs are pointing out (He played with a helicopter once. I know this because David said to take pictures of the helicopter and see what they are going to do, and sure enough the green orb followed it.), to all the cloud messages, to all the faces and the messages sent using the things around me, and the green footprint of the Lord!

Taken September 27 at 17.33.31
Taken September 12 at 14:55.38

Note: The objects in the top left hand corner appear in a lot of pictures. Whatever they are, they are not present to the naked eye: meaning…they weren’t there for me to see with my eyes. They only appear in the pictures on many different days, in many different areas but only over the water.

Taken October 07 at 17:52:50

(November 16)―My mind has been circling around the mean things people have demonstrated towards me lately: the postman and his arrogant rudeness and then a lady posting a comment on my page about the press bringing fear to the people for no reason! I’m beginning to think that the postman’s rudeness was due to color because I really didn’t do anything to justify his response, and I shouldn’t have to be concerned about my mail being delivered in the United States of America! The woman’s comment, which I deleted, is pure blindness because we are in a pandemic! So, this morning when I sat down to write, ‘Senseless Botherings’ came out. It’s clear it is talking about what is coming…the meanness and rudeness and arrogance will only get worse.

Jesus directed me to His words: He says in John 4:27-38:  My food,’ said Jesus, ‘is to do the will of Him who sent Me and to finish His work. Do you not say, ‘Four months more and then the harvest’? I tell you, open your eyes and look at the fields! They are ripe for harvest. Even now, the reaper draws His wages, even now He harvests the crop for eternal life, so that the sower and the reaper may be glad together. Thus the saying ‘One sows and another reaps’ is true. I sent you to reap what you have not worked for. Others have done the hard work, and you have reaped the benefits of their labor.’

Continue reading “‘Senseless Botherings’”

‘Mechanical’s Return’

The worse mark on the heart: Malicious intent: refers to the intent, without just cause or reason, to commit a wrongful act that will result in harm to another. It is the intent to harm or do some evil purpose.

 Mechanical's Return
 
I could tell you to heal
it doesn't mean–
I'm not gonna have to deal
 
I've been fooled by men, too–
saying they were real
giving me all the deep thrills
while kicking my ass
on the treadmill
–that looking-good-for-them
became a perfected skill
–to be honest–
that inside need of mine–
they never fulfilled
 
I've been lied to by family–
that bloodline...not sealed
it's the worse manipulative
battlefield–
I've ever saw revealed
–especially when your ex–
helps the overkill
 
it all adds up in life–
becomes the great ball
of surreal
'did that really happen'
you asking yourself
trying to peel
all those layers–
in betrayal's ordeal
 
you move, then move again–
time...trying to steal
just to keep the heavy pounding
in your heart...still
 
you forgive all of them–
a bit of goodwill
done...you wipe up–
every tear you spill
alone...you move about
doing the ordinary:
eat, dress, clean, pay bills
waiting for the phone to squeal
waiting for:
'I'm sorry'
'I was wrong'
'what was I thinking, please forgive me'
'mom, I'm so sorry...you were right'

 
but it never comes–
even when the total truth...revealed
you realize you're dispensable–
you've been repealed
all their shame–
placed on your head–
without having to drill
–for them...it was so easy
your whole life gone…killed
 
of course, I know what comes next:
it's all your fault–
they'll claim you had control
of the wheel
they'll demand you get down–
kneel
pray, get saved
to God†...appeal
they'll shake you down–
all done in freewill
–you were put on a platter
served up like choiced veal
 
yes, I could tell you to heal
your life...rebuild
stitch together–
all the parts of your quilt
then put it all behind you–
move forward–
on an even keel
 
but then...I'd be lying to you–
I'd be better off
buying you a cocktail
take you...get some pretty nails
put your hair in a ponytail
then get ready...do some blackmail
 
but then...you'd be no better
than that betraying cartel
you'd become just  a plain ole infidel
–your soul...so easy to sell
 
to heal...you yourself
has to...outright...deal
 
you gotta face truth–
you're not the jezebel
you're better than all they dispel
you're stronger, wiser–
ring, ring goes the liberty bell
but first–
you've gotta face the swell
all that shit that put you in hell–
you've gotta roll in its pungent smell
you've gotta cry, scream, yell
–get it all out
in movements of a snail
you've gotta face every detail
learn why...in came...the fail–
their destructive zeal
–not anything...for long
you can conceal
 
then you're gonna bounce–
that's right...bounce
all that pain–
you're gonna unveil
forward....
you're gonna willingly propel
–the chains of your forced jail
no longer for the regale
–no longer...you...for sale
 
after you popped those chains–
you'll realize you fucking derailed
all they tried to nail
on your pretty little fingernails
–you done exhaled
you put yourself in prevail
the mechanical tall-tell
–the tipping of the scales
 
you're gonna learn
–on your own–
you've done been rebuilt
they can't even drown you–
in the best of ales
they can't even go
to the court of appeals
or on you–
seek the navy seals
 
you've become the real
in deal
for you didn't just heal
you've become the truth–
of the kneel!

Note: The photograph that accompanies this work was taken October 23rd, which revealed a lot through the spiritual world: the All-Seeing Eye (an interesting use of the gazebo to tell us that God sees all); the Dragon (The Dragon in Symbolization: The dragon, a legendary creature symbolizes protection, success, wisdom, loyalty, fearlessness, strength, balance, and immense possibility. Being the master of all four elements of Fire, Water, Earth, and Wind, it also embodies primordial power. Details of the Power Primordial Force is the primordial energy that originated everything – reality, time, space, life, death, matter, energy, and every possible and impossible concept existing and non-existing in the omniverse, from a single particular to the infinite  omniverse….God revealing His power and that He is over everything); the cross, God’s use of His energy through the orbs; faces and images of those present…spirits; and the earth’s change coming. In this particular photograph, the All-Seeing Eye; the promise made to me in the pink bubble; and Jesus’ love or presence showing through in the purple light.

(January 6, 2020)―This morning: Write from the heart today. I was empty then full…thinking about the things people will do and say when they have a mark on their heart labeled: Malicious Intent. These thoughts that I write about today started yesterday with me taking myself out for dinner and listening to hypocrites talk about segregated pre-planned housing and how they didn’t want to mix with other people’s traditions and cultures.

Continue reading “‘Mechanical’s Return’”

‘The Adjunct’ (Jesus)

Jesus speaks.

 The Adjunct
 
it is written
time and time again
to be faithful
to listen to the words

of the Lord†
but pillage continues
false gods are still in place
My† people still misplaced

 
they wreaked My† lineage
they seized My† Father's† house
where, O where are you
gentle souls–
who rest in the Lord†
seek refuge in Me†
humble yourself before Me†
I will guide you
I will remove the fools

 
bow down and pray
mercy will be yours
come to Me† and seek
change your ways
violence is coming
He† is angered
His† hands are drawn

 
you can't fight His† wrath
you can't mellow His† anger
bow down, seek Me†
there are wondrous things

on earth
to keep it–
you must save it
all the gold and silver

won't do
it's inside you
the place of refuge
open your hearts
clear your minds

 
it's time to change
His† angered hand is coming
His† wrath will decide
–hold comfort in My† name
listen and hear
have glory in the Father†
for He† is the vessel
all who comes into Me†
will open to Him†

 
blessed is the kingdom
forever and ever
in the Lord's, Jesus the Christ†, name
humble and praise
with My† brothers and sisters
amen

(January 5, 2020)—The word adjunct means something added on, but not part of the whole; something added or connected to a larger or more important thing; an adjunct is a word, a phrase, or a clause that can be removed from a sentence without making the sentence grammatically wrong. An adjunct is usually an adverb used to modify a verb. When used as an adverb, an adjunct will usually indicate a time, a manner, a place, a frequency, a reason, or a degree.

I was directed to the Scripture concerning The Fall of Israel for the second time this week. After rereading it, the title ‘The Adjunct’ came. I wrote what I heard and later looked up the meaning of the word adjunct because frankly it threw me off…not to mention the whole piece, which I wrote what I heard as I always do. Only this time…it wasn’t my Father speaking or David. I wrote each word, each sentence as I heard it. I made no changes. My Brother is not the poet, but His words are eloquent…and this is Him!

Continue reading “‘The Adjunct’ (Jesus)”

‘Not Much’

To love…you make that choice. It’s not changing your mind. To truly love, you can’t change your mind because it is not with your mind that you love: It’s with your heart.

Note: The photograph that accompanies this work was taken November 9th. The image of the double Orbs in the bubble, which appears many times since September 27th, stands for love…a two that becomes a one in harmony because of pure hearts truly loving each other and forgiving each other for each’s short-comings. The purple light coming from the bottom and shining on the Orbs stands for Jesus’ love. You can’t be truly in love without Him guiding you. He IS love.

 Not Much
 
it doesn't take much to love me
–your enchanting laugh
sharing everything inside
(outside is too surface)
it's that place...way down deep
where I know you–
and you know me
–the deepest of secrets–
we keep
between God†, you and me
–and no one else
gets to see
 
it doesn't take much to love me
in my arms...you're free to weep
while letting me hold you–
without having to be neat
letting go...a time in baby
knowing I don't think you're weak
but courageous and strong–
for letting it all out...seep
 
it doesn't take much to love me
it's having our song–
you holding me gently
never embarrassed–
to dance with me
 
it's touching my body
desiring to hold me
–whatever my shape...wanting
giving me that security
that it's my heart–
that sets you free
–not sexy or beauty
 
it's building me up in strength–
gestures and words in tiny
just because you are happy
–to be in my company
 
no, it's not much to set me free
putting me on a course–
you...wanting
not needing...wanting
to please
in a world so hectic–
slowing it down in ease
–giving you back...all of it
what you gave to me

‘Grace in Age’

Competing with that young you when you get older is the worse thing you can do. Men…those not healed…that’s all they see. They don’t know the truth…at ALL!

Note: The photograph of myself taken in November is just to remind you that women in the 50s are not dead. Men make us seem that way because those of us with brains don’t stand by and accept the sins of men. Men, who aren’t of the Lord, don’t like that very much. They too much like their sins. I often told myself in the past that I wasn’t going to be single in my golden years, but, in the back of my mind, I knew I would be. A lot of the world’s men want a woman to be quiet and accept. Sorry, that’s not what God wants of me. I’m told I’m still young and that my day is coming. I trust. I still have faith that God is going to reveal to me what true love looks like. When He does, I’m going to boast in ways you never knew possible. At 50 years old, soon to be 51, when you see that boast, you’ll know God sent me a man who sees my heart and not a piece of ass. That there…that’s real!

Grace in Age
 
tightness of skin...loosens
as hands travel along...adding flavor
character...cleverness in soften
 
lines gather around eyes
tiny moments around lips
a woman's saddened endeavor
as makeup creeps in deep
it becomes a hopeless feat
bringing about smiles in laughing

'why go so hard to try?
this heart is better to see
than color-painted eyes'

 
a body struggling in thin
for a man's touch
a sexual needing rush
'why bother'...she laughs in sigh
boys will boys–
always seeking youthful toys
always wanting to see
something delightful, pretty
instead of looking in deep
where truth, real, maturity
really does seep
 
age comes in...no where to hide
accept all those lines
even if alone you lie
–a toy you'd rather not
a woman in truth...instead of deny
a better way to live your life
 
a gentleman will someday see
your aged look...enough...pretty
enough...sitting, talking with maturity
than a toying sexuality
 
those who left you behind
them, too...gain those lines
lost in a memory's time
of what 'use to be mine'

(December 12, 2019)—Growing old together. That’s what it is meant by a two. Seems so much has been forgotten by so many folks. A woman shouldn’t have to worry about being alone in her golden years, but man seems to have forgotten the most about what it means to be a two. Man has forgotten who God is.

Why is this? What happened to faith? ‘Grace in Age’…it shouldn’t be hard. Trust and forgiveness should be the solid foundation with Jesus and God at the head. I’m so tired sometimes of writing the same thing over and over again. I shouldn’t have to. But reading the Book of Isaiah tells me we haven’t much changed. The only way to get to God’s idea of utopia is to understand His process. Maybe, just maybe, more folks then will understand that growing old together is a joy and should be delighted in.

All you men who look at women as pieces of meat to be devoured then tossed aside, you aren’t going to fair very well when your body sleeps. I heard somewhere that it takes a good woman to get a man into heaven. I wonder: Who determines what a good woman is? In all that I’ve experienced, men see a good woman as one who makes him feel good about himself. Wrong! In so many ways. A good woman is the one who challenges your demons and makes you look at the man in the mirror. Maybe when you finally realize this, you’ll stop running from woman to woman, or stop seeking a woman, of any color, to take care of you.

The maturity part…that is what a good woman is looking for. You, who are more worried about your life, talking about your imagined childhood, talking about your imagined successes…that’s not what a good woman is looking for. She’s looking for a man who loves her just the way she is. When she gets that, she wants…wants…to be a better person because he’s shown her that he wants to be a better person for her. Love is hard. Didn’t you get the memo? And God wants us to love…oh, that Jesus love is sweet…but word to the wise, that Jesus love is hard love…that which makes you look at self in ways you never dreamed. And that good woman…Jesus sent her!

‘A Faith’s Window’

You don’t need permission to do what is right. You don’t need to ask what’s in your heart. You already know that. Follow that.

Note: The photograph that accompanies this work was taken November 11th.

 A Faith's Window
 
it's preparing for rain
when the sun is bright
 
it's saying truth
when it's not even–
expected of you
knowing–
it's safe within you
being something–
only you knew
‒but feeling a pull
a little hurt to deal
doing what is real
 
it's understanding the storm
to set things right
 
it's making moves
‒just something
you have to do
without being told to
even when no one–
understands you
even when they see you
as a fool
 
it's staying the course
no matter the force
going against the core
never asking any man–
what for
 
taking it straight
to the Lord†
for you just know
He's† in charge
 
it's being in tuned–
to your emotions
hearing what's inside
letting it overpower–
everything outside
–arguing and debating
alone in a closed-off room
but never giving into doubt–
without evidence given
to what's it all about
–just doing...even in gloom
because you heard it–
from deep within you
 
when all seems dark
everyone telling you–
what to do
–so lost and confused
knowing truly–
what to do
even if others–
don't want you to
–it's coming
from deep within
void of family and friends
–digging deep...trusting
for you heard the Lord†
talking to you

‘Each Time’

God is NOT a religion. He’s everything. What part of this you don’t get? Jesus is Love! Working for them is hard. People will condemn you. The pit for them!

 Each Time
 
I don't have to write
what I feel
job already spun that reel
 
job tells how you deal
he explains the real
truth...so many conceal
words...sewn up...sealed
 
that's not my drill
here's my only
needing thrill:
have I touched one heart
just one...I look around
–there is none
yes, I've found none
without a whisper
without even one word–
there's nothing to sort
easy...there comes no clutter
to even...with...bother

You've† removed
every single one
–gone
even my little ones
there's no one
so, what I have won
 
I question
You† answer
share...You† demand
help them understand
what's eating–
the hearts of man
 
still..no one
not one single one
 
each time–
comes Your† demand
take my knowledge
to this deceitful world–
take a stand
 
each time–
less I have
each time–
love...I get–
not even half
 
instead...sacrifice
at Your† hand
for woman and man
evil to withstand
but...they chalk it up
to wantings of fans
 
for penny games
the pit's national grandstand
putting everything about You†
into a circus of alien brand
 
each time–
You† ask of me: more
alone stands at my door
You† keeping me from them all–
society's beck and call

I appreciate the stall–
Your† love
throws me up against walls
for You† catch me
every time I fall
 
each time–
I ask for someone
still...no one
for I'm designed for a two
in a world
where there's so few
who to You†...are true
 
each time–
I ask and wait
each time–
tears You† bring
in sad songs
to sing
Continue reading “‘Each Time’”

‘Time to Pray’

It’s beautiful outside isn’t it? A peaceful time…give Thanks to God. For He is the reason it’s a beautiful day.

Note: The photograph that accompany’s this work was taken on October 15th. God’s talking. It’s simple. Listen.

 Time to Pray
 
don't bow your head–
mourn for the dead
they are now gone
you're still safe–
in your home
 
pray for your resurrection
pray for spiritual protection
 
lift your head

you are not dead
praise in solemn joy
in loud sounds–
raise your voice
you're given this choice
let your eyes moist
then look up–
not down at soil
–your life's not yet
in spoil
 
pray for happier days
pray to live the way
 
unite together
in these times–
join and gather
listen to your heart
instead of falling apart

all things done in darkness
shines again
with love and forgiveness
 
pray...it's a time in rejoice
pray in ease–
leave out bitterness' claw
–this is time to review
read over all the clues
make a choice in go
then let the heart grow
forget long ago
it's time to glow
–let love flow
 
pray in a unite
pray for the light
 
when all comes in fold
don't grow cold

see...as the sun peaks
there in...love sneaks
take time in weave....
pick up piece by piece
those living in receive

–leave those in decease
for all those gone...
Jesus'† wide open
for the receive

you who remain alive
know your body didn't die
open up...feel the vibe
don't fall to plight
so you too...will walk
in the light
Continue reading “‘Time to Pray’”

‘Soulful Fight’

True love. When you’re willing do hard love to save another person…when you sacrifice your own self, your own heart, to force the heal, God sees. When you do that, you’ve done Jesus’ work…laying a foundation for His love to take over.

Note: The photograph that accompanies this work was taken on November 9th. The bride and groom. The sign of Jonah plays an important part in this image. Resurrection. Heal.

 Soulful Fight
 
I went after the leprosy
with everything I had–
in my raging diplomacy
 
as you crucified me
I forced my eyes in see
there was evil lurking–
in supremacy
it had you by the balls–
sucking you up
in turbulency
 
so I forced the trenchancy
put my own life–
in uneasy
fighting in urgency
in a faith-based vagrancy
using a ferocious vulgarity
mixed with heart-filled tranquility
 
it was a war in predominancy
a constant in persistency
with a Jesus†-driven prophecy
in scripture proficiency
 
I refused to give in–
to its juvenile delinquency
as it continued
its obvious redundancy
 
no...I had a certain resiliency
a God†-powered superiority
–a whole lot of
bayou-girl tenacity
 
I wavered all my
constitutionality
plus my respectability
–my inward-driven notability
 
yeah, I rebuked its notoriety
with a whole lot of animosity
a bit of flavored immaturity
–a bit of raging hostility
 
no matter the difficulty
I broke its embedded dynasty
 
all to save your soul
from a firing eternity!