A sample from Book 5
Yes, it does. That’s why I felt compelled to write this book. Anger does some awful things to us. When you are going through something you really don’t understand and you don’t have the resources to help you, anger builds.
There was nothing for me to grab hold of. For you, you now have this book to help you understand how anger controls you and how to get a grip. The following is from the Introduction to my 5th Book in My 12-Book series. I hope that this book can keep you from making the mistakes I made.
“…In the previous book, my denial and isolation stage, I didn’t add much to the work except for the introduction, several pickings from my journals, commentary from a manuscript I was working on between the years 2003 and 2006, and commentary from Facebook. This book will be a bit different. I didn’t write much commentary on the posted work on Facebook. I wrote from so many perspectives that to help you understand how I got to the darkest part of this year, I need to share deeper things.
So, I’ve included some texts, emails, postings from my personal social media pages, including Tagged which is a dating (raunchy) site I joined first to do research on a novel I was writing at the time, then as a way to try to spice things up in the marriage. I have also written brief explanations on some of the works to explain what was happening at the time. I’m using the post on social media, the text, the emails, and a few brief notes I made to help me do this. None of this is made up. This is my life.
There are three people who are greatly affected by all of this. My three children. This was as confusing for them as it was difficult for me. They were seeing what I was going through. They were hearing what their father had to say. They were experiencing the lack of everything from everyone else…all because I decided I wasn’t going to be hush-hush.
How the people around us treated us was the most hurtful. No one whom I called friends came to help. My children had me. I had my children. Then I had God whom began the flow of messengers into our lives and awakened me to His love and Power.
I can’t say I did no wrong. I would be wrong. I can say that I was on a journey I did not choose. I didn’t understand it. I didn’t want to then I did. This year, the circle begins. It was dark. It was confusion mixed with total chaos for me and my children. I did whatever it took to stay afloat. Whatever it took….
I wear a tattoo on my right arm that read’s in Latin: God’s Scribe. My daughter picked it out and in August of 2012, it became forever a part of me. The week before I got this tattoo, I came as close as I will ever come to taking my own life. That night I was in a battle…a screaming, crying, rage of a battle. It went on for hours and hours. My daughter heard the whole thing.
When I finally broke through, we left. We just drove. We ended up in Lafayette, Louisiana. We got a hotel room. On every channel from the moment we arrived until the moment we left (Saturday night to Sunday), there was a constant stream of programs about domestic abuse. My daughter turned to me and said: Is God trying to tell us something?I believe He was.
When I got the tattoo the next week, my daughter told me that when ever I felt that I was going down to that dark place again to look at my right arm, this tattoo that I wear, and remember why I’m here. My daughter is very wise….”
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Additional On Abuse…Codependency, Narcissism, Trauma…and Healing
(Each page has loads of additional books (in every format), videos, instruction materials, and inspiration gift ideas.):
I Know Why the Cage Bird Sings by Maya Angelou
I Am Malala: How One Girl Stood Up for Education and Changed the World by Malala Yousafzai
Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited by Sam Vaknin
Pathways to Recovery, A Strengths Recovery Self-Help Workbook by Priscilla Ridgway, Diane McDiarmid, Lori Davidson, Julie Bayes, and Sarah Ratzlaff
Power: Surviving & Thriving After Narcissistic Abuse by Shahida Arabi
Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone You Care About Has Borderline Personality Disorder by Paul T. Mason and Randi Kreger
The Anger Control Workbook: Getting Through Treatment and Getting Back to Your Life by Dr. Matthew McKay and Dr. Peter Rogers.
Triggers: Creating Behavior That Lasts – Becoming the Person You Want to Be by Marshall Goldsmith and Mark Reiter