‘Spaces of Real’

That place where you are no longer hurting!

A sample from Book 7

 Spaces of Real
 
where do you fit in
when you're searching
for truth
–all seems a flute
 
when you're pushing–
revealing all you do
just to get through
 
when you talk to God†
–each day
just getting by
wondering
how
this day
you survived
 
knowing
because of someone else
tears you try
not to cry
 
over anger
you become
a hardened manager
wondering
what it is
that's
lost inside of you
 
yes, where do you fit in
–this society of fake
lost in its self-absorbed wake
 
when men are weak
constantly
searching
something always better
they seek
 
hanging you out to dry
without reasons of why
 
leaving you
constantly
searching
for spaces of real
where there's no reason
to conceal
what's truly hiding
deep inside
Continue reading “‘Spaces of Real’”

‘Pillars of Death’

Depression: The Feeling of Your Own Death!

A sample from Book 7

 Pillars of Death
 
I'm an apparent suicide
who took
everything buried inside
‒sprayed it out
like pesticide
 
they call it a homicide
raging words
was all it took
for love to dry
‒leaving only tears
to cry
 
slowly I died
asking every kind of why
 
why only anger's words
was enough
to cast me aside
 
why my truth
was reason
my life
‒its very existence
to hide
 
my being
no longer resides
in hearts
I believed
could override
evil's prancing stride
 
they all cast me aside
for thoughts...words
I could no longer
hold inside
 
instead of holding me
as these eyes cried
they buried me
‒an unmarked grave
deep outside
with bugs and flies
Continue reading “‘Pillars of Death’”

‘Veiling of Truth’

Speak Your Truth or Live in Captivity!

A sample from Book 7

 Veiling of Truth
 
we start off life
slow–
like a snail
 
taking each moment
as it comes
giving ourselves
time to breathe
 
inhale
exhale
 
we're young...vibrant
over anything
we're champions
we have mentors
–someone always there
 
pushing us
tormenting us
encouraging us
criticizing us
 
it doesn't matter–
we feel invincible
–strength
in our youthful hearts
gives us one desire
over anything
we can prevail
 
so we take chances
we jump fences
crawl through tunnels
see life
as a simple funnel
 
when we're derailed
we take a moment–
wail
giving ourselves
time to breathe
 
inhale
exhale
 
we get back on the rail
sail
 
then life tips the scale
–half-way point
where all just stops
we're pushed over the top
 
we try to sail
to no avail
we start to see
–the slow coveting veil
the part of us
for others we curtailed
 
bit by bit–
small pieces of our being
we willingly retailed
leaving us
feeling alone and stale
 
it's at that moment
no longer wanting
to feel frail
wanting instead
again to breathe
 
inhale
exhale
 
taking from our legs
our tucked-in tail
revealing...opening
this perfectly placed veil
 
it's at that moment
we explode
our outpouring gale
see me, hear me
I'm not for sale
 
opening our truth
putting ourselves
in plain view
screaming out loud
this is what I'm about
 
it's at that moment
when life tips its scale
all is unveiled
we see every detail
 
who impaled
who drove the nail
 
ourselves
 
we chose to lower the veil
we signed our own
bill of sale
 
it's at that moment
–tipping the scale
our truth
to unveil
get back on the rail
over our own injustice
prevail
Continue reading “‘Veiling of Truth’”

‘I’m But a Child’

Take It To God and Let the Child In You Breathe!

A sample from Book 7

 I'm But a Child
 
would you believe in Him†
if you had riches of gold
would you honor Him†
if you weren't in the cold
 
in your darkest days
do you hold faith
 
when no money's in hand
when deceived by man
do you cry out to Him†
in a simple hymn
 
when possessions
flood your gates
when you have so much to take
do you stop a moment
say wait
let me give some away
 
do you welcome
the sinful in
treat them
like a friend
or do you shun them
thinking
you're better than them
 
do you hide
what's deep inside
swallowed by ego and pride
not wanting the outside
see you cry
or do you rise high
trusting in God†
that He†
won't turn with a sigh
but see your I
never asking you why
never you, He'll† deny
 
are you strong enough
to admit
I'm but a child
I've failed along the miles
but God's† with me

all the while
 
it takes strength
to admit defeat
falling to His† feet
forgiveness...plead
 
unconditional love
free will
 
His† love is sealed
His† love is real
 
He† forgives you
it's all up to you
with nothing
to others
to prove  
Continue reading “‘I’m But a Child’”

”Secret’ No More!’

Their Play Is All the Same!

A sample from Book 9

 'Secret' No More!
 
the cat's out the bag
 
on the surface‒
I no longer scratch
‒don't want to sound
like a hag
not even a nag
but I'm done
playing this little game
of tag
 
I no longer want
the jab‒
that sneaky, sly syntax
keeping me in a corner
my existence entrapped
secrets over nightcaps
 
for so long
at it
I merely laughed
playing along‒
this hidden
out-of-sight craft
 
for so long
I fell into its path
to feel barely half
of a lover's swag
 
not any more
do these eyes sag
I now see
the repeated red flags
 
here they are‒
if you want to keep track
here they are‒
if your eyes
are stuck in lack:
 
away from public view‒
begins
the slow, gentle snatch
 
text this, text that

a hi here
a hey there
even the wyd flair
 
then the ignore
playing-with-the-mind anthrax's
added-on little snap
 
maybe a phone call or two‒
avoiding a bit of snag
 
(the now understood common trap)
 
oh! how texting does that
 
‒just a tiny dab
the get-what-they-want hatch
 
turning texting to sexting
in a flash
 
then sit back...relax
as she falls in the trap
her mind...now attacked
with a little zap‒
man-ego-driven
mind-boggling witchcraft
sealed and wrapped‒
one-sided—playing-out wrath
 
sexting‒
the perfect-controlling telegraph
 
then comes
the moving-on slow raft
to get that big splash
‒adding to their stash
images behind
a monitored glass
 
a little skin
in flash
with some sexy sass
 
the building in pizzazz
wanting more
of that flabbergast
 
building, building
téte-a-téte
 
then veiled in a masque‒
when questions invade
the on-and-off going chitchat‒
 
a quickened spat
back to the ignoring splat‒
ego...alive and well
in combat
 
'til comes that final blast
flesh to unmask
an act in diplomat
making her feel all that‒
the sexy little kitty cat
 
‒the play in chat
becomes
an in-the-flesh transact
 
good or bad‒
putting her in abstract
continued words on a pad‒
her mind to distract
rather hijacked
from their away-from-her
reality fact‒
 
she's not the only lass‒
their on-going sexting hack
blatant ways in acrobat‒
that and this
this and that
 
'til her avoided questions
forces a react‒
 
why not spend time with me
why the constant disappearing act

 
she innocently asks
wanting beyond
the sexual wrap‒
wanting out of secret's
hidden tap
 
the continued avoiding lap
puts her mind
in wondering's rasp
 
all-stop...hold
goes the lit glass‒
with no returned téte-a-téte
or to-the-door dash
or a together attach
nor explanations to patch
or synchronizing photographs
not even a social-media match
 
her mind opens up‒
I've seen all that
recognizing perfectly
the plotted graph
 
experience, experience
the exact-patterned zigzag
she's once again caught
knowings in fact‒
 
their intentions
won't go
any further than that
 
for her unanswered questions
suspicions‒
her experiences in reasoning
reality's opened-up rap‒
 
she's just one of many cats
in their secret's rattrap
 
‒with all these red flags
no need for a polygraph
I don't even need an ax
or a wiretap
not even some mindless booby-trap
 
just a sentence or two‒
seeing through the claptrap
then sit back
watch the unwrap‒
 
innocence offers a laugh
 
let's fix this hash
to you...I want to holdfast
let's have a blast
out in the open

'let's make our splash
 
guilt opens up the wrath
 
a shutting-down fast
placing-blame lash
social-media delete
the final smash‒
the secret
given the shaft
 
no longer do I fly half-mast
no longer am I the secret
in stash
 
yes, the red flags
seen in perfect format
 
I'm no spoiled brat
not even
lost in over-react
 
this kitty cat
just knows where it's at
 
I'm more than just a paragraph‒
a secret in scraps
 
I'm all or nothing
an out-in-the-open en masse
willing to adapt
with another walking
the same path
Continue reading “”Secret’ No More!’”

When His Next Best Thing Comes Along!

This one sergeant in my Army days in Germany called me Marie Laveau…lol…another one bites the dust! One of them will be strong enough to handle my energy some day. If they can let go of their pride long enough. I’ve had enough of man-ego-pride to last a life time.

Continue reading “When His Next Best Thing Comes Along!”

‘Floating in Air’

Stress-Free Zone Ahead!

A sample from Book 8

 Floating in Air
 
I came around
to see change
shortening the range‒
just to see
all's the same
 
so I float
in this air
here and there
hoping for flair‒
hearts open
gentle love's token
but all's still broken
‒all's still forsaken
eyes still closed
minds sealed‒
that forever
round and round wheel
 
so I'll reside here
just for a while
give a little time
then off I'll fly
forget
all this here try
fully learning
no one can rearrange
what's lost
in derange
what refuses
to grow
stay stuck
in naysayer's flow
 
so here
I'll just float in air
give a chance
a second
a third
then off
I'll go
 
hit the road
seek places
where real love
flows
without needing
chances to prove
out right show‒
I won't just be there
flowing freely in airs
desiring to share
‒easy will come
care
 
yes, somewhere
out there
lies a place
one face
overshadows
two-faced
where real
the only deal
‒truth
over comes fool
this place
I'll feel the overwhelming
need
to drool
 
there‒
I'll come down
stand on solid ground
without a need
to just float in air
for then
I'll truly feel a need
to open up‒
for something
care
feel life's breath
in share
really be there
in that place
somewhere
Continue reading “‘Floating in Air’”

‘Dwelling’s ‘Back Then”

Move Forward: Body, Mind and Spirit, and Leave the Past In the Past

A sample from Book 8

 Dwelling’s 'Back Then'
 
we lived back then
‒our biggest season
living in young
everything’s begun
never still...sitting
‒moving in the constant
of run
having class
having fun
our communion
‒our glittering sun
 
reminiscing
reliving‒
our mind’s on-going reunion
‒a slight prison
caught-up spectrum
indulging...believing
our past
our best, truest companion
 
turning needles to diamonds
quarts to gallons
each new past
remembering sermon
grows
consumes‒
our present moment’s devotion
 
staying stuck
good...bad
all problems, experiences‒
abstractions
‒digging deep
our use-to-be fund
concealing
present’s affirmations
 
it’s done‒
time for a ascension
new’s dimension
 
the past‒
our firm confirmation
holding on‒
constantly living
in its circulation
‒caught in its dreamy emotion
keeping us in equivocation
bypassing present’s creation
 
it’s done‒
our back then
 
it’s time
make the incision
no longer in young
but still living
in fun
willingness to run
 
keeping our retrospections
but allow in
new manifestations
all else‒
move to preservation
 
it’s built us
gave us qualifications
for now’s implementation
 
stop dwelling on
back then
start living
in now’s skin
 
new moment’s begin
heightens
ascends
new memories
creating a foreign spin
awakening
now’s life
we’re in
 
allow the transcend
build new mountains
‒from young
to older...wiser
within
 
then‒
sets a new trend
that day coming
age sets in
on porches
breathing in fresh winds
under summer suns
in chairs
rocking
memories
unpacking
easily spoken
story-telling
of live in living‒
not broken
not stuck in young’s brethren
 
instead‒
a put-together rendition
of a life lived
in total contribution
 
let go of back then
awaken
in now’s innovation
live‒
new moments
in motivation
new memories
adding to collections
 
for in aged years
recollections
the spices‒
our truth’s personification‒
the new young
can’t get enough
with us
lost in conversation
Continue reading “‘Dwelling’s ‘Back Then””

‘Pity-Party Me Not’

Don’t Fall To the Devil’s Trap and Lose Yourself to Pity!

A sample from Book 8

 Pity-Party Me Not
 
save your grace
‒me crying in your face
maybe it's best to walk away‒
not have your good spirits replaced
with my selfish-daunting embrace
 
don't let me crowd your space
in a lost self-pitying race
I have to find my way
backward steps
not to trace
get up
move forward‒
there's a dream to chase
‒a gift
in my heart
God† did place
 
in all that oh-poor-me lace
‒wasting day after day
I put aside what's great
for others' self-demeaning fate
‒those who lost faith
not giving time of day
to words God† had to say
 
that day after day
turned to year after year
willingly serving myself up‒
a circling, dead-horse tray
my own bed made‒
self-pity's prized bait
 
around and around
up and down
burying my I
around, around, around‒
a circling maze
‒down, down, down
in self-pity I laid
 
to whomever'd sit and listen
I'd saturate‒
serve self-pity's cake
jump in with pleasure
without thought‒
bathe
smothering my I in hate
on self
adding burdensome's weight
 
flying free
in the greatness of unease‒
my eyes‒
lost in sedate
‒shielded behind bondage's tape
over my happy‒
anger's blackened cape
misery's base
I did drape
 
I closed all gates
let the sun's ray
slowly sink to night's blackened gray
‒down, down, down
in a mercury-ladened lake
'til I laid in waste
seemingly sealed in a darkened cave
 
I held on tight‒
my wilderness-mentality trait
fighting against moses' trusting faith‒
doing whatever it took
‒forget heart's break
with constant play‒
attending every sinful date
‒hearing God's† words
refusing to obey
falling down, down, down
not caring what's at stake
from reality‒
wanting to separate
losing to evil's webbing spray
 
everyone turned‒
from me
ran in haste
'til self-pity became my only mate
 
then came the day
deep inside me‒
God's† hand began to vibrate
my wavering faith
evil couldn't take
‒mixed-up signals
my heart began to translate
at first
a slow rate
raising from a bottomless crate‒
I began harder to pray
 
through all my mistakes
for me
God's† patience did wait
cradling me
as I lay
‒drowning in self-pity's tears
softly patting my back‒
knowing how slow this I operates
telling me:
 
it's going to be okay
take your time

it's your way to make
no matter the pace

it's never too late
‒whatever the case
I'll† help you break

evil's enclosed vase
 
harder I did pray
hearing clearer His† words
stronger became my faith
'til that magical day
His† light alone‒
out of that darkened cave
my way
He† did pave
 
here and there
self-pity comes, says hey
for moments‒
again
I lose my way
but as light as a needle of hay
He† lifts me
‒His† light pours within me
an abundance of rays
blinding evil's come what may
filling me with gentle's taste
‒oranges, apples, grapes
fruits of my labor
the brilliance of grace
my truth in faith
proving to me
nothing stands in my wake
 
so, each time
self-pity‒
I seem to embrace
just give me space
let me alone face
find my own way
backward steps
less and less to trace
each new day
faster and faster
I replace‒
that wilderness-mentality trait
‒evil's webbing embrace
oh-poor-me beckoning date
soon to disappear
without a trace
 
the deeper I pray‒
quicker and quicker
I re-find my way
 
with purer, stronger faith
realizing
it's not just a dream to chase
it's a gift‒
in my heart
God† did place
 
so, my self-pity
please don't embrace
turn away
give me my moments
to pray
my special one-on-one date
just me and my Lord†
‒heavy in faith
immersing my I
in words He† has
to say
 
‒no time limits placed
on days I pray
just know when I emerge‒
I'm stronger
heavily armed in His† way
so each tomorrow
I'll easily face
for I'm endowed‒
smothered happily
in His† amazing grace
Continue reading “‘Pity-Party Me Not’”

‘Codependent’

The Codependent: Make Yourself Happy First!

A sample from Book 6

 Codependent
 
I've tried to help
in ways
that didn't help
 
I've said yes
then no
to my self
 
I've avoided
hurting others
only to hurt myself
 
to trust my own feelings
I've been afraid
 
I've believed lies
then betrayed-
I often felt
 
I wanted to get even
punish others
for putting me
on a shelf
 
I often
became smothered
in anger and hate
-wanting to kill
not feeling safe
 
I've fought
for others' rights
when they didn't know
how the law swayed
only to be left
alone
like an abandoned stray
 
I've often settled
for others' worth
-left my own
to grow another day
 
I became
the reaction
to others' anger and hate
instead of listening to self
walking my own way
 
I became
less of me
for others
to be set free
 
I've lost myself
to dependency
on how others felt
without seeing
my own need
to be free
to be just me
Continue reading “‘Codependent’”