‘Allegorium’

What it takes to keep love!

A sample from Book 11

 Allegorium
(Sweet Man)
 
(what is it in life
if you can't tell
wrong from right
to see in sight
what is of great heights
to know
from a wrong fight
and a right fight
‒one worth the cry
one not worth the try)
 
there was a yell, a scream
an act of rage
mixed in scents of sage
 
she would leave
she would leave today
her bags...she began to pack
‒the stress off her back
 
she voiced everything
she wanted to sack
her mind lost in a haze
remembering
all those great days
‒reasons why she stayed
 
anger filled in a maze
this way, that way
‒which path to take
 
wanting to run
in spite of the fun
then in comes the pun‒
standing eye to eye
tears suddenly
fill in cry
 
we just can't be together  

shaking
coming from deep inside

I know

each not willing to move‒
standing their ground
knowing
without making a sound
it all comes down
to mixes in race
different traditions
different tastes
 
but that's just the base
to what lies beneath‒
experiences
in the lace
 
wanting her to stay
knowing
his moments in rage
‒can't keep her in a cage
from her mind
it won't fade
searching
for words to say
 
wanting nothing in fright
in his dark eyes‒
seeing the willing light
wanting her to seek it
please make it bright
understand the hard in my life
for it, I had to fight
sealing up everything inside

 
confusion succumbed‒
the sudden in rays
from his silent, pleading glaze
it's not just his aces and eights
that's on the take
 
she adds up the sum
to it, he wasn't dumb
every piece, every crumb
has to be sorted‒
to smooth out
the constant lump
 
another chance
another steady ride
taking each side
‒what's buried in hide
no matter how many lows and highs
wobbling
through pass homicides
all those moments‒
others confused their minds
making them want to pounce‒
in anger...quickly dive
 
thinking through it‒
hearing every sound
warnings, confusion, heart‒
feeling the surface of found
wondering where its bound
this constant round
has to sooner or later
release its hound
when wanting to stay
is all around
 
softly relaxing
the lines on her face
that unconditional
is not in a trace
‒it's in the base
of foundation's lace
without living in a race
 
what others see as a toxic tray
may just be
the difference in race
in raised traditional's case
‒angers set in
wanting to be erased
 
each learning to let go‒
what once slapped them
in the face
releasing anger's ways
that keeps trapping them
in a haze
‒exploding in a blaze
 
what is it in life
if you can't tell
wrong from right
to see in sight
what is of great heights
‒to know Jesus'† life
why for us, He† died
 
love is worth the ride
for it, pay the price
for the reward
everlasting life
Continue reading “‘Allegorium’”

‘Win the Game’

You gotta stomp ‘negative’ to the ground!

A sample from Book 11

  Win the Game
 
say it sweet, say it deep
I'm in for the keep
 
know the curious fleet
those in your head‒
putting you in weep
 
it's just voices in need
hungry in greed
‒trying to get the heed
blinding you from see
so you don't want to be
 
it's just turds and pee‒
a careless, selfish deed
happiness...out
it wants to beep
all its hate‒
wanting you to meet
 
say it sweet, say it deep
I'm in for the keep
 
stomp out that weed
don't give in, don't feed
strip away
every poisoning seed
kill it from its creep
don't be just a referee
be the one
with all the beef
the one that holds
the pivoting decree
in which
no one has to agree
 
don't be too loud
don't be too meek
say what you deem
make it your solid creed
 
hey, you motherfucker
this is me
take a hike
flee
to myself
I give this meed
from you

I AM freed
I AM the BE in ME
Continue reading “‘Win the Game’”

‘Frustrated Notions’

Don’t let anyone halt your dreams!

A sample from Book 11

 Frustrated Notions
 
the planes fly
just as they did when I died
‒came back alive
 
music still plays
on the radio
in the same way
as back in the day
when every piece of life
seemed to just go away
 
the sun shines
even in a different state
everything's find
except one‒
a meaning in define
the way...crossing that line
‒the other side
of the rhythm and rhyme
 
plagued in this frustrated notion
a little self-induced commotion
focus on you indication
‒away from all the ramifications
that sunk me in damnation
 
knowing from which it all comes
‒sometimes, stuck in dumb
waiting around‒
dropped bread crumbs
to build an inside beating strum
from some kind of outward drum
that never seems to come
 
this fucked up halt
‒encaged self-provided vault
has it all locked
a walled-up block
as time keeps ticking
on the clock
 
fight, fight, fight
 
it's all there in sight
just one more night
‒do what's right
minus the blight
 
winds still blow
waters still flow
as imagined thoughts flaunt
its desire to haunt
just playing its taunt
 
fight, fight, fight
 
climb that final mountain top
‒don't stop
as planes fly
as the sun shines
as winds blow
as waters flow
‒it's all God's† big show
to the other side
it's time for the ride
feel the second half of life
without any
frustrating tides
Continue reading “‘Frustrated Notions’”

‘Live’

Don’t put it off until tomorrow!

A sample from Book 11

 Live
 
today means nothing in tomorrow
today means nothing in yesterday
today is today
 
yesterday was once today
tomorrow will be today
one known, one unknown
yet, today is
 
what happened yesterday
won't happen again
what will happen tomorrow
just a guess, my friend
 
today, oh! today
each second, each minute
each hour...is ours to devour
 
don't think of what was
nor what will follow
 
today...over...tower
be its blooming flower
without counting
seconds, minutes, hours
 
for death still comes
for all...not some
never knowing the exact hour
no more, blooms the flower
 
today, shines the light
no need to fight
it's up...so bright
use it in delight
without thinking twice
 
for yesterday is gone
tomorrow...an unsung song
today, oh! today‒
today is
so...go on...live
 
Continue reading “‘Live’”

‘Depths of Heart’

Mind your heart or others will not!

A sample from Book 11

 Depths of Heart
 
protecting self‒
not letting any other
put it on a shelf
seems to be utmost important
‒above anything else
 
for in self
happiness lies
rises high
above health
any amount of wealth
‒pulling the heart
out of hell
out of the darkest well
 
for in truth heart dwells
untied from man's inhuman belt
released from whatever shelf
man tries to impel
keeping the heart from melt
‒happiness locked in a cell
 
get out, get out
see yourself‒
way deep inside
where happiness compels
in heart
where it truly swells
Continue reading “‘Depths of Heart’”

‘Thoughts in Suicide’

When you’re driven to the point of wanting to take your life!

A sample from Book 11

 Thoughts in Suicide
 
I sit to write‒
I had a destructive night
one...again...I had to fight
get out, get out
I screamed in shout
then alone I pout
wanting to die
‒these thoughts in suicide
 
I gather the pills
then to the floor
let them spill
then picked up the phone
dialed somewhere
not to feel so alone
 
1-800-273-8255 press 1
my crying's already won
death won't come
I can't forget‒
a promise not moved to undone
 
she waits in my thoughts
the one in memories
brought
the one to the floor
pills fell
myself's destruction
caught
Continue reading “‘Thoughts in Suicide’”

‘Source’

Anxiety created from the fight against codependency!

A sample from Book 11

  Source
 
she waits‒
closes her eyes
breathes deep
‒her face tingles
her heart races
her palms sweat‒
a heat under her skin
rises...coming quick
 
shh...she repeats to herself
 
each sound
each speck of light

builds the burning

she fights
 
shh...again and again
 
don't do it...not again
she begs repeatedly
 
settle down, please
 
begging, begging

the exploding need

building, building
 
forcing her mouth closed
forcing her body steal
‒as tears stream down her face
 
begging, begging
 
can't you see...anyone
can't you see

I'm trying, trying...
my grip is slipping...

 
as she loses control‒
her mouth yells
or her tears fall
‒no matter who's around
down, down, down
she falls
 
back to a child‒
innocent, broken
just for a while
 
'til she regains
strengthens
to go
one more round
in life's paradigm
where between herself
and herself
she fights
 
hoping, hoping
 
the next time‒
she'll steady the line
‒that too often...
breaks her holding-together vine
 
Continue reading “‘Source’”

‘Truth’

Racism, hate: Evil’s best friends. Don’t let it consume you!

A sample from Book 11

 Truth
 
liars seek truth‒
falsifying a life
without any light
 
manipulation...their due
cutting it on cue
‒without noticing
the coming dues
 
their belief‒
trying to convince you
all they do
true, true, true
backing them‒
there are few
 
their spots change
sending you to the loo
oh! what to do?
‒without cursing them, too
 
truth is truth
existing
no half truths
‒it's either all true
or just makings
of a waterloo
Continue reading “‘Truth’”

‘Disillusionment’

When politics blinds your truth!

A sample from Book 11

 Disillusionment  

she stood there shaking
what have I done‒
causing this imagined awakening
‒have I forsaken
forgive me, Lord†

ease this hating
 
in her silence
her heart opened
‒a simple token
what truly lived
in this here maiden
 
she watched them all
as the stones began to fall
‒to her knees
no longer...she felt tall
over and over
coming at her skin‒
little hard balls
 
then a sudden stall
stopped...silence
a mere moment
she recalled
 
the dust settled
her tightly closed eyes opened
upon her dress‒
tiny red splattered drops dribbled
her pain...tiny tickles
what...a blink before
it seemed a fable
 
her fear lifted
was this a gift
her sins shifting
to ultimate's forgiveness
‒this she did not know
but the sudden stop
she felt her heart unfold
 
cast your stone‒
if clean...your bones
 
she heard the voice
then the made choice
as all around
stone after stone
hit...not her
but the ground
 
silence remained
she still knelt‒
in blood stains
as shifting of feet
the sudden in retreat
 
silence...not daring
to lift her head
then a shadow overcame the red
a hand reached out
get up child
a mere whisper without shout
 
strength from Him† came
as her legs rose
her eyes did the same
 
His† light dried her tears
all became so clear
her heart felt clean
in His† eyes...she seen
truth's unending scene
her life redeemed
it wasn't a dream
‒pure and serene
forever...trust in Him†
she proclaimed
for the Lord†...by her side
remained
Continue reading “‘Disillusionment’”

‘Straight Curves’

Putting the past behind. Hoping to find a future.

A sample from Book 11

  Straight Curves
(Sweet Man)
 
do you love me
words from a man
minutes before
thinking to can
not wanting anymore
to understand
 
catching me off guard
in tracks...all stop fold
rescuing me from hard‒
that place
where lives cold
‒another puzzle's piece
put where it belongs
in this rebuilding heart
 
yes, with everything I have

honesty
from the start
even when denying
played its part
 
a softening catches us
all our past moments
put in a cup
stirred then drank
building up
to that silly thing
they call love
 
the beast in warrior
the fire in cracker
spilling their rage
‒a yell and shout
to let's talk it out‒
what communication's about
 
a curve
again made straight
‒playing our aces and eights
 
get the fuck out
no thanks...I'll stay
 
no, at all
meaning words in say
in eyes
no need to sway
that past wanting to break
in the real
out...lay
 
patient...I'll wait‒
no matter what others say
you're worth it every day
my heart's here to stay

 
one question
smoothing tension
God†...part of the equation
brings a heart to attention
 
each struggle faced
soft, gentle pace
haters

you won't find a trace
I'm† here

your Father's† embrace
those curves

I'll help straight
 
yes, a firecracker, a warrior
forgiving yesterday's sorrows
from no promises of tomorrow
to questions in borrow
 
do you love me
 
easy and free‒
the I of me
whatever comes what may‒
Yes, I'll stay
for he, too, said
he moves the same way
Continue reading “‘Straight Curves’”
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